A Sure Thing…

I would say i am pretty easy going, i am very open to change, i am always willing to sacrifice and i will always go the extra mile….

what i have recently learned and come to terms with is that i always like the sure thing.

whatever it may be, jobs, relationships, school, i would say the important things in life, i like to know exactly what im getting or what i am getting myself into.

in the past few months i have had to face my fear of embracing the unknown. i have had two main things hit me like a ton of bricks. the first thing i have had to overcome is my application to the police academy. it is highly competitive and i have absolutely no idea what i am going up against. i have never been in a place where i dont know what my outcome is. generally i play it safe when it comes to my life and future. ill always take the safe job and the safe rout. this police job is completely a coin toss. i know its what i have a passion for, what i want to do and what im going to love. i have to try, i have to jump. and if i fail, then i learn… and grow…and move forward.

the second thing….well, lets just say its another unknown, something i care about, and something i have no idea what the future holds for it.

i guess the main thing is, i am growing up and trying. a few years ago, i would have almost instantly given up. it kind of makes me realize how important these two things are in my life, how im willing to go all in and accept any reward or consequence the comes from either of them. i will continue to be scared, question, worry and stress about both. but i know now i can walk away victorious or walk away knowing i tried and did everything possible to obtain the things i wanted the most.

pardon my rambles

All is fair in love and war

and who are you?

A constant thought…

When did Christianity become a contest?

I am a Christian, i would not say i am the perfect Christian, but I do believe in Christ, and i do my best to follow him everyday. lets just state that…

But come on people, if i have to read one more post, blog, bumper sticker or empty verse reading or any other thing along those lines… i am seriously going to vomit.

the way i see it, you might as well wear a big flashing sign that reads ” I AM BETTER THAN YOU” or better yet “LOOK AT ME”. Judgment at its finest. you can pick it apart anyway you want. its little things like the famous ” ill pray for you” line….how many people do you think actually pray for you when they say that? i would say less than half sadly, yet people say it . its for selfish reasons, because it makes THEM look and feel better. zero intention for the other person…

its all for personal gain, not for Christ’s glory, and honestly i am tired of it. i am tired of what society has made religion. its becoming a fad, a social outlet, not a relationship with God.

i dont attend Church. i would like to, but i dont because i get angry with it. every time i walk into church i have to endure the classic row of teens who are there to socialize and they do it the…whole…time, distracting me for the reason i am there. then the famous rock concert worship. now, i like music and instruments, i think its a great way to glorify God, but i dont need to hear power ballads gold at church. i feel like im at a bon jovi concert everywhere i go. it makes me wonder….who are they really doing this for? them… or him? just a thought…

now, i am aware i probably sound like a anti christ ass ranting about people and the church, and it may even come off as hypocritical because here i am judging people, just like the people i described. but i really think if Christ came down and saw what the church and the Christian faith had become…he wouldn’t be pleased.

if you have any thoughts, questions, or would just like to pick apart this topic, write back ( not like i have any followers haha)

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someone very dear to me told me how amazing it is express your thoughts through writing… i guess this could be a fun way to do it…

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